Cruel and Inhuman Treatment is one grounds for divorce in New York. To plead this ground in a complaint for divorce, you must establish that the course of conduct is harmful to your physical or mental health making cohabitation unsafe or improper. In other words, you must show more than mere incompatibility and the misconduct must be serious, not trivial.
Length of marriage plays a major role in this grounds for divorce because transient discord in a new marriage might meet the criteria for cruel and inhuman treatment, but in a long term marriage actions the conduct would have to arise to serious and substantial mistreatment. For example, in Soto v. Soto, 216 A.D.2d 455 (2nd Dept., 1995), the court specifically states, “[i]n view of the short duration of the marriage, the verbal abuse, both public and private, and physical harassment of the husband by the wife, cruel and inhuman treatment was proven.”
Clearly, specific facts and circumstances are needed to establish whether there is a ground for divorce based on cruel and inhuman treatment. In Stoothoff v. Stoothoff, 226 A.D.2d 209, at 210 (1st Dept., 1996), the court found that there was cruel and inhuman treatment where the husband engaged in conduct “including public and private denigration, calling her crazy and threatening to have her committed to a mental institution, threatening to burn down their house, threatening her with financial ruin, committing an act of physical abuse and intimidation, and constantly ignoring her and refusing to communicate or have sexual relations with her for years on end, all of which caused her decreased appetite, lost sleep, nausea, stress, and anxiety”. However, in Gross v. Gross, 40 A.D.3d 448, at 449 (1st Dept., 2007), cruel and inhuman treatment was not established where the wife alleged that the husband “physically grabbed [her]” and she testified that “[h]e’ll grab me, he’ll pull me down the hall, he’ll block me so I can’t leave the room, throw me on the bed, push me against the wall” but she resided with him throughout the trial.
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I have been married for 8 years and my husband had inherited a million dollars just before we were married and is cheap terribly I have had a great job but had been hurt on the job a year ago and have been on comp and surgery and maybe another up comming I have racked up 22k in credit card bills went from excellent credit to poor and husband enjoys this because I am stuck here he refuses to use “HIS” money to pay off my debt even after I told him I would repay it I am physically ill daily due to my debt and he could car less what are my options?
i have a recorded confession of him raping me when i confronted him about his affairs and attempted to end the marriage he also.admitted to punishing behaviors i was unaware of. also gaslighted 3 therapists in an attempt to control me. His last affair was right before the pause . this time it was just a date to a church with some girl he had shipped friendship flowers on valentines day, Im so in over my head. I have sypmtoms of cptsd . before the pause i was under the care of 2 Therapists and a domestic violence councelor. I gave him another chance based on his promises. but its clear he is lying as he just tried to imply i made it all up to control. I cant keep up with the insanity.. i think i have battered wife sydrome only he has never beat me in the traditional sense.30 years of intense gaslighting has taken its toll on my sanity