Communicating with your ex-spouse is a challenge at the best of times, but with the pandemic, it’s become more complicated than ever.
For some former couples, this has meant an increase in disagreements and out-and-out fights. However, it doesn’t have to be this way.
In times of uncertainty, it’s vital to communicate more than ever, manage your expectations, and adapt to circumstances that may be uncomfortable.
Being upfront and honest is critical to keeping the lines of communication open. Now is not the time to try to disguise your true motives or your plans. For instance, if you plan to do some traveling, this can set off alarm bells for your ex-spouse even if your child won’t be going with you.
You may be able to set your ex-partner’s mind at ease by disclosing your plans for the mask you’ll wear and by committing to limiting your exposure in public places.
It also may be helpful to try to communicate in a different manner. If you and your ex-spouse always seem to end up in a shouting match during telephone calls, consider sending emails or text messages instead. Take the time to review everything that you’ve written to ensure that it isn’t likely to be misinterpreted. Written communication can be a useful tool for slowing things down and cooling tempers.
Many former partners are scheduling virtual visitations between the non-custodial parent and the child. It’s a wonderful way to maintain closer connections without unnecessarily exposing the child to coronavirus. The virtual world may provide another option to facilitate communication between parents. If something needs to be discussed, perhaps set aside some time at the end of a virtual visitation to bring it up. Some people just seem to communicate more easily when they can see the person with whom they’re speaking.
No matter how you choose to communicate, it is vital that you both discuss your boundaries during the pandemic. For example, one parent may feel that playdates are still acceptable while the other does not. If at all possible, it makes sense for the couple to come to a sensible compromise.
It isn’t always easy for former couples to agree on boundaries, even if both are committed to being flexible and trying to understand each other’s perspectives.
If you’re having trouble communicating with your ex-spouse, then maybe it’s time to consult with Rincker Law at (217) 531-2179